...or maybe not. Not even close actually, but it was a catchy title. I thought of it first, of course. She borrowed it.
Mr Fabulous posted an interview meme the other day that seems to be continuing on and on and on. Of course, volunteering for it I am helping to keep it going on. He has very graciously (at knife point) asked me five questions which I will attempt to answer with utmost honesty (cough*bullshit*cough) here in order that you get to know me a little bit better (you can get to know me faster by blowing me of course).
1. Maybe it's just the picture you have up on your blog, but you look like a pretty tough guy. Could you take me in a fight?
In a word, Yes. Need I say more? No? I will pontificate anyway. I always fight dirty as there is no such thing as a fair fight so I make sure to keep at least a knife with me at all times as you never know when you are going to have to skewer some dickhead that cuts you off in traffic. Provided you are able to run him off the road first. If you are a lover not a fighter, even better because I can cut your head off faster and then take your chicks as well.
2. You have three children. Would you consider selling one to me?
Actually they have already been promised to scientific research and as the government generally promises a bit more than the white slavery market, I chose to go with them. I also get the benefit of having the proceeds directly deposited into my bank account as well, thus saving me from having to get off my ass and go to the bank.
3. You consider yourself to be a Libertarian. Is that to get babes?
Actually I think the hottest chicks lately seem to be republicans. Unfortunately most of the libertarian ladies that I have managed to meet seem to be the unwashed hippy kind. You know, the ones that have more armpit hair than I do and are always smelling of patchouli? Freaking nasty patchouli smelling hippies suck.
4. Do you believe there are such things as soul mates or do you think the game of love is one big crapshoot?
I think I met my soul mate at a little place called the Gold Club about 20 years ago. As I gazed into her eyes I...Oh, fuck that noise, I was just looking at her tits anyway. While I don't think that it is one big crap shoot, I think that love is something that grows over time rather than finding your soul mate.
5. You manage a restaurant. Admit it; asshole patrons get bad stuff done to their food, don't they?
Was that you last weekend? Crap. Actually the place I work at is an open kitchen three feet away from the customers. It is much more difficult to dribble in your food when you are watching than one would think. I do manage to drip a goodly amount of sweat on busy weekends though. Adds a bit of salty flavor when needed. Now I did used to work for TGI Fridays which is a closed kitchen. On that I have to refrain from commenting for various legal reasons :)
I have enjoyed this meme thoroughly. If you would like to participate:
1. Leave me a comment saying "Interview Me".
2. I will respond by asking you five questions.
3. Post your responses on your blog. If you send a track-back to this post it will also appear below this post as I am leaving it open for my Monday Open Track-Back post.
4. Include the explanation as well as an offer to interview someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions ans continue this viral meme thing.
11
One question - do you have a single younger brother for my lovely stepdaughter? LOL
Seriously...she can cook...
He's taken, but my son is 18 :)
Oh dear...well, she's 24 so I suppose that's off.
I guess.
...I mean, maybe I shouldn't be so superficial. Maybe she wouldn't...
No, no. Ahem. Never mind.