I was reading this article over at CNN that talks about a new line of greeting cards that this lawyer (figures...) came up with while looking in vain for a birthday card for her brother-in-law while he was incarcerated.

Both the wife and I had a good laugh at some of the cards which include wonderful sentiments such as "You had the choice to be 'naughty or nice.' And you chose ... Now you have to do your time. But, Christmas won't be the same without you here." or "we're all praying for you while you do your time". The first one is actually pretty funny and it got me to thinking.

It hurt, too...

Anyway, while I was sitting here drinking my morning coffee and reading I came up with a couple of greetings for incarcerated loved ones myself.

Congrats on the birth of your child!...It's not your's.

Merry Christmas you fucking loser.

Happy Thanksgiving...We're enjoying a fine repast whilst Bubba stuffs your ass like a turkey.

A bit of Christmas cheer for my favorite dope, and here's to hoping you don't drop the soap.

You guys have any you want to add to the list?